I discovered mold in my home last week, at first forcing me to let go of some things. But then I had a choice of what to keep and what to release. And choice is hard.
She let go. Without a thought or a word, she let go.
She let go of the fear. She let go of the judgments. She let go of the confluence of opinions swarming around her head. She let go of the committee of indecision within her. She let go of all the ‘right’ reasons. Wholly and completely, without hesitation or worry, she just let go.
She didn’t ask anyone for advice. She didn’t read a book on how to let go. She didn’t search the scriptures. She just let go. She let go of all of the memories that held her back. She let go of all of the anxiety that kept her from moving forward. She let go of the planning and all of the calculations about how to do it just right.
She didn’t promise to let go. She didn’t journal about it. She didn’t write the projected date in her Day-Timer. She made no public announcement and put no ad in the paper. She didn’t check the weather report or read her daily horoscope. She just let go.
She didn’t analyze whether she should let go. She didn’t call her friends to discuss the matter. She didn’t do a five-step Spiritual Mind Treatment. She didn’t call the prayer line. She didn’t utter one word. She just let go.
No one was around when it happened. There was no applause or congratulations. No one thanked her or praised her. No one noticed a thing. Like a leaf falling from a tree, she just let go.
There was no effort. There was no struggle. It wasn’t good and it wasn’t bad. It was what it was, and it is just that.
In the space of letting go, she let it all be. A small smile came over her face. A light breeze blew through her. And the sun and the moon shone forevermore.
Lovely words, Jan! My wife and I recently moved, and I too found myself cleaning mold off old boots and deciding what should stay and what should go. You've captured the feelings so well--both the deep memory carried by the objects we love, and also the freedom of moving lightly through the world. Thank you! Good luck with all that mold, hope you can get it fixed soon!
My daughter and SIL have been watching, forgive me not 100% on the accurate name, “The Minimalist”. A guy who basically gets rid of everything he doesn’t use or need anymore.
Well like you Jan, letting go is sooo difficult for me. I’ve sung professionally and have dozens upon dozens of backup tracks that I used for performances. Well in today’s society places dont have tape players… lol
I know I should get rid of them but what if? Then I tell myself “what if what Carol, these aren’t used anymore”. So they sit in my attic, safely in a rubbermaid bin, not a box, but to bring myself to dump them is excruciating. Ugh!
And then it comes to my parents and sisters things. I feel if I throw their stuff away Im throwing them away. Their clothes were no issue, although I’ve kept some of Kathy’s clothes 🥰, but other stuff is difficult.
Dad had this lamp that he used on his nightstand. Its not attractive per se but I now use it on my nightstand. My youngest daughter who loves interior design is always on me how it doesn’t match my decor in my bedroom but IDC, its one thing I cant let go of.
Long story short, lol, I feel your pain Jan. Letting go is so difficult for me and yet I know there’s a cleansing with it as well.
Please be praying for me on my Letting Go journey and I will be doing the same for you.
Thank you for this, Jan. When I was clearing out my mother's house last summer, there were times when I felt like the sheer volume and mass of everything she had kept (which was literally everything) would crush me. It wasn't simply a matter of WHAT was there. It was about the absence of taking stock. Because, I have found, it's virtually impossible to get rid of stuff without putting intangible things to rest. Without moving on from a particular period in your life. Without saying, "This is no longer who I am." Or, "I don't need these things anymore to be happy." It's never just about the stuff. In reading your piece, I realize that the things I've given away have to a great extent been a relfection of the parts of me I have shed in my effort to get closer to who I am.
Provoke us to throw away or give away everything we own that encourages us to believe we're better than anyone else....This is a very powerful suggestion and I love that it begins with the word "provoke." I'm finding my personal paper the most difficult to get rid of....birthday cards from friends in the fourth grade, you know. I do take some comfort in the fact that that particular anguish seems to be universal. It's not just me.
She Let Go
She let go. Without a thought or a word, she let go.
She let go of the fear. She let go of the judgments. She let go of the confluence of opinions swarming around her head. She let go of the committee of indecision within her. She let go of all the ‘right’ reasons. Wholly and completely, without hesitation or worry, she just let go.
She didn’t ask anyone for advice. She didn’t read a book on how to let go. She didn’t search the scriptures. She just let go. She let go of all of the memories that held her back. She let go of all of the anxiety that kept her from moving forward. She let go of the planning and all of the calculations about how to do it just right.
She didn’t promise to let go. She didn’t journal about it. She didn’t write the projected date in her Day-Timer. She made no public announcement and put no ad in the paper. She didn’t check the weather report or read her daily horoscope. She just let go.
She didn’t analyze whether she should let go. She didn’t call her friends to discuss the matter. She didn’t do a five-step Spiritual Mind Treatment. She didn’t call the prayer line. She didn’t utter one word. She just let go.
No one was around when it happened. There was no applause or congratulations. No one thanked her or praised her. No one noticed a thing. Like a leaf falling from a tree, she just let go.
There was no effort. There was no struggle. It wasn’t good and it wasn’t bad. It was what it was, and it is just that.
In the space of letting go, she let it all be. A small smile came over her face. A light breeze blew through her. And the sun and the moon shone forevermore.
Rev. Sapphire Rose
Lovely words, Jan! My wife and I recently moved, and I too found myself cleaning mold off old boots and deciding what should stay and what should go. You've captured the feelings so well--both the deep memory carried by the objects we love, and also the freedom of moving lightly through the world. Thank you! Good luck with all that mold, hope you can get it fixed soon!
This one took my breath away. Life itself is letting go. Aging is letting go. Until we finally find our way back to...home.
Wow! Talk about timing on this one!! Whew!
My daughter and SIL have been watching, forgive me not 100% on the accurate name, “The Minimalist”. A guy who basically gets rid of everything he doesn’t use or need anymore.
Well like you Jan, letting go is sooo difficult for me. I’ve sung professionally and have dozens upon dozens of backup tracks that I used for performances. Well in today’s society places dont have tape players… lol
I know I should get rid of them but what if? Then I tell myself “what if what Carol, these aren’t used anymore”. So they sit in my attic, safely in a rubbermaid bin, not a box, but to bring myself to dump them is excruciating. Ugh!
And then it comes to my parents and sisters things. I feel if I throw their stuff away Im throwing them away. Their clothes were no issue, although I’ve kept some of Kathy’s clothes 🥰, but other stuff is difficult.
Dad had this lamp that he used on his nightstand. Its not attractive per se but I now use it on my nightstand. My youngest daughter who loves interior design is always on me how it doesn’t match my decor in my bedroom but IDC, its one thing I cant let go of.
Long story short, lol, I feel your pain Jan. Letting go is so difficult for me and yet I know there’s a cleansing with it as well.
Please be praying for me on my Letting Go journey and I will be doing the same for you.
Cheers!
Thank you for this, Jan. When I was clearing out my mother's house last summer, there were times when I felt like the sheer volume and mass of everything she had kept (which was literally everything) would crush me. It wasn't simply a matter of WHAT was there. It was about the absence of taking stock. Because, I have found, it's virtually impossible to get rid of stuff without putting intangible things to rest. Without moving on from a particular period in your life. Without saying, "This is no longer who I am." Or, "I don't need these things anymore to be happy." It's never just about the stuff. In reading your piece, I realize that the things I've given away have to a great extent been a relfection of the parts of me I have shed in my effort to get closer to who I am.
Provoke us to throw away or give away everything we own that encourages us to believe we're better than anyone else....This is a very powerful suggestion and I love that it begins with the word "provoke." I'm finding my personal paper the most difficult to get rid of....birthday cards from friends in the fourth grade, you know. I do take some comfort in the fact that that particular anguish seems to be universal. It's not just me.