Small things in a Big World
The wisdom in holiday movies, keeping things simple, and the gift of friends
“Home is not a place, it’s a feeling. And he was beginning to wonder if he’d ever feel that way again.”*
“Faith is believing things when common sense tells you not to.”**
“To see something, you have to believe in it. Really believe it. You can’t see something you don’t believe in.”*
“I believe, I believe. I know it’s silly, but I believe.”**
“Hope. We all need hope. A spark of magic to keep us going.”*
“Life is pain. But it’s also magic.”*
“Are you ready for Christmas?” The question came out of nowhere and startled me. I hesitated. “Well… I did hang ornaments from the shower curtain!” Which, of course, makes no sense to someone unless you’ve seen it and also seen our house, which is still in complete chaos with no floors and too many boxes.
The bank teller, a stranger to me, went on, “It’s easier now that the kids are grown. It’s not as much work. But I’m not ready, still too many things to do.”
And there you have it: Christmas as an adult. Too many things to do.
Buying presents, sending cards, baking cookies. Fighting crowds, standing in long lines, stretching a thin budget, looking for a bargain. Hanging lights, putting up a tree, attending parties. Being jolly when you really just want to go to bed early. Eating too much sugar, drinking a more alcohol than is good for you, feeling bad about gaining weight.
Christmas is hard. Creating Christmas is a lot of work. And if you’re a parent with small children, even more so. So much more so! The magic and wonder and joy that you want your kids to experience seems to fall solely on you.
It doesn’t have to be that way. Maybe we’re trying too hard. What if we just let some of it go and focused on the small things?
Many years ago, I went to Yellowstone Park for the first time, and waited to see Old Faithful. I rolled my eyes sitting impatiently on that bench. More and more folks showed up and sat down, along with lots of kids. And then it happened. Old Faithful erupted. My mouth fell open. I had no idea it would be so… so… WOW!! When I pulled my eyes away, I noticed a bunch of kids not even looking. Small kids, aged maybe four to seven, were not struck by the same awe we adults were feeling. And that’s when I understood.
When you’re a kid, everything is new. Small things are a wonder. It doesn’t take much to be amazed. Children don’t need the big things. In fact, the big things can be overwhelming.
We adults could learn a lot from this. We could feel so much better by keeping things small.
When I moved to Oklahoma, I brought only one container of holiday decorations. All the fun stuff I had accumulated over the years - ten large boxes of lights, garland, ornaments, and other decorations, some antique, some new, some from my childhood – I gave this all away. But in the one container I kept, I have things that make me smile.
It's the little things.
The quotes above come from two movies: A Boy Called Christmas (a Netflix original, 2021) and Miracle on 34th Street (1947).
I have a handful of holiday movies that I enjoy watching every year. But they can’t all be streamed and my DVD player isn’t set up yet. This is how I came to see A Boy Called Christmas. It’s a good Santa origin story but mostly I like this film because it addresses grief. The loss of a parent, the loss of a friend. Grief makes us sad, yes, but it also can make us bitter, angry, and fearful. During the holidays, many of us find grief at our doors. It’s good to remember that we can hold that pain, even honor it, as well as enjoy a bit of delight and awe.
“The darkest night will end. The sun will rise, and Christmas mornings will come again when anything and everything can happen.”*
What’s your favorite movie of this season?
Tonight is the Midwinter Solstice. My favorite holiday. I’ve written about this before, Here Comes the Sun, and it includes a wonderful version of the story of Amaterasu, the Japanese Goddess of Light. And last year, I wrote about The Magic and the Mystery of this season, which includes an official L.A. County license to keep a unicorn. (you know, just in case you live in L.A. and have a unicorn…)
Whatever your situation this time of year, may you feel rested, safe, and loved. May the wonder of small things be enough. And may the comfort of home surround you.
My heart is particularly full of gratitude for all of you that are here and reading. I even have a bunch of new subscribers, Yay! I am now just six subscribers short of 1,000. If you know of anyone else who might be interested in Finding Home, I hope you will share.
I wish I knew all of you personally. Truly,I am humbled that you choose to spend your time with me each week. I really love when you comment so I can get to know you.
Your kindness is a gift. And then occasionally, there are special gifts that stand out. Like when you buy me a cup of coffee or become a paid subscriber. Two years ago, I wrote about receiving unexpected and personal gifts: When a Gift Brings You Home. Two weeks ago, this happened again. A surprise package from Spain arrived with a lovely card and a special gift for Mazie - a reflective dog bone to keep her safe while walking at night. And here in the Wood River Valley, we have a “Dark Sky Ordinance”, which means you really do see the stars when they’re out - and the nights are dark indeed. I think I know who sent this - but I don’t know how to reach you, so I hope you’ll leave me a comment!
Blessings, friends! Wishing you the happiest of holidays. May these days be holy indeed.
Merry Christmas! I too have scaled down the boxes the decorations. I love your shower curtain display! I have one the same -tree with bells! Oh yes- and the grief... ! The simple things for sure. I watched Miracle on 34th today while wrapping presents. Be well my substack buddy!
Your posts always make me feel good—so thank you, Jan! This one is particularly important given the "consumerism" built into this holiday. I have too many Christmas movies that I cherish to pick just one, but Miracle on 34th Street is right up there!
The best of holidays and much good fortune in 2024 to you and Tom!